I tested the relevance of the plumber this evening. The toilet in my house has not been functioning for the last half a year or so. I mean, it usually takes about three tries to get the bastard to flush.

Two months ago, it went dead. I made several attempts to flush the toilet. Guess what? My hands were all blistered and the bastard just wouldn’t flush!

Time to take some action, so I made a mental note to do something about it.

Two months without flushing the toilet? How did I managed that? Well, I guess I have to say the SAF had a part to play in this. You see, I was the Toilet I/C in BMT. There, I learnt that there’s nothing that half a pail of water wouldn’t flush off. Even granite chips!

Armed with this knowledge, I taught every toilet user in the house how to flush toilets before the flush was invented. Okay, it was common sense. I placed a pail in the toilet. Said “Use the pail!”

Well, I must say the pail gave me some leeway to hesitate and procrastinate but two months later, I did it! I bought a new flush!

When I returned from work this evening, I went straight to the toilet and got busy. Two hours later, I replaced the flush.

It didn’t work. The bastard did not flush! It trickled. Ten tries later, I gave up. I’m not about to get all blistered again.

I shall not get into too much details but I made an attempt to repair the old flush and two hours later, the old flush is back in the WC thingy, the new flush is in the bin, and the toilet is back in the one in three tries state.

Is the plumber relevant? Well, I guess I can live with one flush every three tries, so the plumber ain’t gonna make much moolah out of me.

That being said, to all my friends reading this, “Don’t ever ask me to repair your toilet. Give the plumber some job.”